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Building Emotional Intelligence

Building Emotional Intelligence

Author: Chris Alex /Tuesday, July 21, 2020/Categories: SNI Companies, SNI Financial, SNI Certes, SNI Technology, Accounting Now, Staffing Now

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Want to improve your emotional intelligence? Here is a good place to start.

Before we delve into how to build your emotional intelligence let’s first look at exactly what it is. In short, it’s how to identify and manage your own emotions and that of others. Psychology Today breaks it down further into three skills: “emotional awareness, or the ability to identify and name one’s own emotions; the ability to harness those emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problem solving; and the ability to manage emotions, which includes both regulating one’s own emotions when necessary and helping others to do the same.” Due to the varying personalities, capabilities, and difference emotional strengths of individuals in the workplace, it’s extremely helpful to build your emotional intelligence and studies show that those who do are better able to motivate themselves and their teams. Here are some ideas to help you get started.

3 Vital Questions
If you struggle with speaking too quickly, without thinking things through first, this is a great method for you. Before you say something ask yourself these 3 questions:

  1. Does this need to be said?
  2. Does this need to be said by me?
  3. Does this need to be said by me now?

While it only takes a few seconds to answer this in your head, it can be a huge game changer in improving your emotional intelligence.

Lean into Awkward Silence
Going off the point above, it’s a good idea to think for a second before you answer, especially if it’s an important question that warrants a thoughtful response. While it might feel awkward, give yourself 5-15 seconds to think of what you want to say so you are able to articulate it in a more meaningful way instead of fumbling with your words while trying to get your point across.

Give and Take Feedback
Thoughtful and helpful feedback is vital for a person’s growth and development. When you are receiving feedback instead of feeling criticized, view it as valuable. If you leave the conversation with your ego feeling a little bruised, give it some time so your emotions are more in check, before asking how that feedback can help you improve. On the flip side, if you are the one giving feedback try to focus mostly on the positive. Tell them what they are doing right as this will help motivate them, and if there is something they need to improve upon, approach the topic in a friendly matter and try and relate to the issue. Perhaps it’s something you used to do as well so share how you changed. It’s important to give them tools for how to improve vs. just stating that they are doing something wrong. People want to be given the chance to succeed so show them how.

These are just some fast and easy suggestions on how to quickly build emotional intelligence. It’s an important skill to strengthen not only for your professional career, but your personal life as well as it will help you become more empathetic, self-aware, and have more self-control over your emotions. If you want to develop this skill further, Inc., has a great article on this with even more tools.


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Chris Alex
Chris Alex

Chris Alex

Chris comes with 10+ years of Specialized Staffing industry experience and he has placed 400+ Professionals in various markets.

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Full biography

Chris comes with 10+ years of Specialized Staffing industry experience and he has placed 400+ Professionals in various markets. He is a multi "Reach for the Stars (both Chairman's Club and President's Club)" Winner and he prides himself in having a high level of ethics while providing his clients with the highest level of service possible.


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